"Angel?"
You turned around after a small pause, "Music... girl?"
Fate, my mind screamed. Some God had taken pity on me. Either that or He was torturing me. He was lofting in the clouds, watching me try to convince myself this girl I barely knew wasn't my ticket out of my hell. I probably looked like a dog chasing its own tail.
"What a coincidenece." I was trying to sound suave, I'm pretty sure it came out sounding slightly pressed from the thoughts racing in my head.
"It's fate, I'm sure." You beamed up at me now. "Or you're just stalking me." I blurted out.
I had to look away to stop my breath catching at the look of you. It was a little embarrassing honestly. Did I always fold for looks? Did I ever even have a type? All my life I've only ever been mildly intrigued by all the beautiful stars and models I've seen on screen or occasionally on campus.
But you.
God, you.
You have been making me forget how to breathe at the mere sight of you ever since we met.
You giggled and I had used every ounce of my self control not to look back at you.
You pathetic creep, I had told myself. Stop thinking of her as a fascinating art piece, she's human.
You're just human.
Like me.
"I hadn't thought about it until just now, perhaps I will." A lightness had entered your tone. It made me huff out a laugh.
The line finally moved forward and you stood second to the person billing their goods when I had asked, "Fancy bread then? What kind do you like?"
"Oh. I don't eat a lot of bread. Just randomly I crave tongue numbing sweetness then I drop by to pick up their vanilla donuts."
"Tongue numbing sweetness?!" I made a sound of disgust, you laughed again.
"Hey a girl can crave whatever she wants on her period." You spoke in a matter of fact tone. "You're on your period?"
"Sadly yes. I had to take two tablets of painkillers to numb the stabbing pain."
"That sounds tough. I never get pain."
Your jaw dropped.
"You what?"
"No pain. Ever. Maybe some very mild, I don't know, cramps I guess, but nothing that distracts me from going about my day."
"I've never met someone with no pain at all. I can't walk somedays. It gets so bad I lose feeling in my legs and begin rolling around in my bed bargaining with god."
"No hot packs?"
"I have some," you sounded exasperated, "I mostly just pass out before I even get to numb the pain. So painful sweetness helps."
I hummed at that and finally noticed the little ball of fur between your legs.
No. Not little, more like half of your size.
Not little at all.
I had locked eyes with your dog and had tried giving him a small smile.
He had barked back at me and you had flinched, "aster!" You had tugged at his handle thing, "No barking aster."
I swear the first time I saw Aster, he was glaring at me.
Like he knew I was coming for his master in some way. He just didn't know I was going to spend the rest of our time together suppressing the urge to be close to you all the time.
"He's very beautiful. Does he help around? Like those dogs, what do they call them?"
"Yea he's a guide dog. Trained. He's the most playful one I've had. But he gets his work done." You smiled faintly.
I had glanced down at Aster, to where he sat by your feet, not even wagging his tail simply looking straight ahead.
"What are you here to buy?" you had asked. I'm sure I said something stupid like "Plain bread, we're out." or something. You went ahead in the line and billed your donuts.
I was a little curious to see how you'd manage yourself at the cashier. I tried to imagine myself trying to get something billed without being able to see. I found myself doing that often around you. Putting myself in your shoes. Trying to feel the world the way you feel it. I could never, no matter how much I tried.
The way you lived life was so bright. You lived life in a way that made the colours around you overfill and bleed over. Being close to you stained me in those bright colours. I thought at times that perhaps that was why I had this urge to be around you.
But there were days, I'm sure you remember, when your world had gotten slightly bleak.
Even then, my angel, all I wanted to do was wipe your precious tears away. Nothing about that situation had made me crave the colours you brought to life, all I had felt then was the same, thrumming urge to be near you. To be someone to you. To have you rely on me.
Like a friend, I had stupidly reminded myself.
That day at the bakery you had offered me two donuts, as a gift to commemorate the fate that had brought us together that morning. I had politely refused, then you had shoved them at me.
Do you remember, my angel? I had offered to walk you down to your place, mostly to spend more ime with you. You had seemed unsure at first, then agreed. "I can show you my place." you had said, "you can come over, maybe, some day after our next class and practice at my place. My studio is right above the place I stay at."
I glanced down at Aster diligently guiding you down the street. "I'm really no good with my hands. I signed up to the class on a whim." I had mentally beat myself up for saying that.
Wasn't I the biggest idiot for being honest to a fault around someone they thought was cool? Perhaps I wasn't, because you laughed. A rich, surprised laugh.
And I walked alongside you, reminding myself to keep putting one foot before the other. I didn't want to trip over myself at the simply the sound of your laughter.
Perhaps I should have done that sometime.
I'm sure you would have cried laughing at something like that.
"I doubt you're no good with your hands, you play music. Besides, that was just a stupid excuse. I want to be friends. Maybe going to my place is too boring." you had stopped walking on the sidewalk, it was barely mid day yet.
"Let's go on a picnic." I had spoken without thinking.
you looked surprised for a moment, then smiled, soft and sweet, "that sounds lovely. I take Aster sometimes to the park near by. You could join us this weekend, if you'd like."
God really was playing with me after all.
"I'd love to." I had bit my tongue pretty hard then, to try and stop my voice from sounding so awkwardly high pitched. "I'll get juice and some charm. Maybe a few board games?"
"Sounds like a plan." you gave me one of those soft, genuine smiles again and I could have melted into a pathetic puddle right there on the sidewalk.
"I'll see you next week. Bye Music girl." you walked back into the apartments you lived at, I had noticed how luxurious it looked even then.
"Bye angel. Till next week then."
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Very late! I know!!
I've been slacking off lately. (҂ ꒦ິヮ꒦ິ)
I really should pull myself back together. ( • ̀ω•́ )✧
I hope you guys enjoyed the story. Have a lovely day humans. ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞ • *✰
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