Saturday. Morning.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6hblvuqGH
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The morning rays of the sun warmly coated my room with their light. The glimmer carefully caressed the sheet of my bed which made it look like the white was glowing. A small portion of it softly graced my desk with its touch. It was where I sat last night to be diligent with my studies. Light entered my windows while they were open and that allowed me to hear the songs of sparrows bathing in its radiance. Peacefully. Gracefully. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymgaQVrLek
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In the corner, across my bed, I stood in front of the mirror stand. I was applying my makeup, just a while ago, but it took me about thirty minutes to decide how I would present myself out into the world. Not like the whole world would see me, after all, I just didn’t like going out without any makeup. I examined my face one last time, checking to see if I had applied them right. Light blushing cheeks on top of a thin foundation. Pink painted on my lips. A subtle eyeliner drawn to highlight my round eyes. The hazel inside shone beautifully, just like I intended. And the small mole under my eye was deliberately untouched, so it would be seen, to what I considered to be somewhat charming.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1VsvLVCa6
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I turned my head to the right, turned it to the left, lifted it up a little, then dragged it down to my chin. I thoroughly analyzed every angle of my face. And when I was done, I tilted my head and winked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrB68PPCYf
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Perfect.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwuXYDTNhfT
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Now it was time to inspect my clothes. I wasn’t sure what to wear earlier. I was trying to decide between two options…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXBTHFhcKN
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A light blue lace blouse. Delicate floral lace decorated each shoulder before moving inward to meet at the center of the chest, where it blended into the solid fabric that covered the rest of the blouse. Beneath it, I was planning to wear a fitted pink camisole that would peek through the lace.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpXCxPG240
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Or…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvoBHinkLE
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A soft yellow blouse with a modest V-neck. Its flutter sleeves began at the shoulders but split open along the upper arm, revealing a bit of the skin. The frilly lower half draped over my arm, remaining attached to the blouse instead of hanging separately. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdScwP5JWfd
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After fifteen minutes of deliberation, I chose the latter and paired it with my favorite skin-tight jeans that hugged my legs that ran down on top of my ankles.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw84zJa0Oba
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I turned to the right, turned to the left.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUSe4gOoa4
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Perfect.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ31DHtMBTz0
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I nodded. Proud.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCq5qglYkb4
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My eyes started navigating their way toward my hair. Blonde. Not naturally, I started dyeing my hair since I was in 2nd year of middle school. Not particularly because I was trying to follow a certain style, but because during 2nd year of middle school, I once saw a foreign drama, subtitled, and the lead actress had beautiful long hair which was, to my eyes, glittered like gold and I ended up mesmerized by it. I tried to imitate what I saw, wavy, loose, long. I liked it ever since, and I started liking it even more now.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjpfokzaJd
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I still remember the first day I dyed my hair though, my Mom was too shocked that she wasn’t able to say any coherent words for about five minutes before she proceeded to lecture me. I kept doing it anyway. Every day Mom told me to dye it back, every day I didn’t. Dad was still not working overseas that time so I had someone to calm her down and take my side. He wouldn’t be angry. He would just smile and explain to my Mom that it wasn’t that bad, that it was just a way to express myself. In fact I did look cuter with blonde hair. Until eventually she stopped complaining about it. It took about a year, but there were still a few months of that look of disapproval. And eventually, from last year, Mom started to help me dye my hair.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFMISYULPG
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I giggled from the memory. I missed having Dad around but I had learned to let the memory be filled with warmth instead of sadness.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgAVCCvsIx
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I went toward my desk where I prepared my usual earrings. My hands sorted them out first, then I picked them up one by one and started wearing them. After I had worn the last one, I went to my bed to put my phone inside my shoulder bag. The notebooks Kuroiwa had told me to bring had already filled up all the space inside it. Again, I marveled at how thick they were, seeing that four notebooks could already make my bag full. But I needed to take my phone with me. I unzipped my bag and put my phone on top of the notebooks. Then the door opened.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62Djh4XEBK
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“Ru-nee,” my favorite and only little sister showed up when I turned.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQASIZlv4fn
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“Ruri!” I said half loud, half careful. I didn’t want to catch my Mom’s attention. I hurriedly went to her then covered her with my embrace. Ruri was still rubbing her eyes and yawning. She was so cute that I just started rubbing her head. “Good morning, did you just wake up?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLHPcfK420M
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“Mmm.” She nodded and looked at me with her adorable eyes. “Ru-nee, where are you going?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Efa5iV4Km
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I picked her up and we sat down on my bed. I let Ruri sit on my lap.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXa1Ubqx98a
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“I’m going out to study,” I said.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY3Myl4qF6L
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“What? You’re going to study again?” Ruri protested.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7pd1UKQwkT
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“I’m sorry, but onee-chan needs to study for the exam.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRCJ1OlaqkX
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“Nooo. Stay. You already went studying last week, you promised we’re going to play today.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrPJalsag4
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“Next time, okay? After the exam.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfeswj48d4
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Ruri didn’t seem to approve of my compromise. Her eyes and her pout were the evidence. She can be too spoiled at times. Well, it was mostly my fault. Ever since she was a baby, I had already been adoring and spoiling her. I wonder what it would be like if she was just a year or two years younger.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5qMgGjUCu
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I smiled at her. But her pout never faded. Then, she noticed my makeup.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVm5C9pdzk
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“You look much prettier today,” she said.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxAzcpPRkS
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“Really?” I smiled.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaHGaIdHbO
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“Yeah, Ru-nee, you’re already pretty even without makeup, why are you putting it on?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjm9MjdVNfT
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“Well, you will understand when you grow up,” I said and I poked her nose each time I spoke my next words, “Just. Like. Me.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsA0UpSsqJ
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“Can I try?” Ruri asked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtn2FWEwt2
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“You’re still too young, Ruri.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2r74vutjq
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“But I’m already ten.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAaNfTzWNB
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“You’re only allowed to wear it when you become as tall as me, okay?” I lifted my free hand and hung it in the air, about three feet high with palms facing down, and my elbows bent slightly. “You’re still this short, see?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHBK1mVTAZ
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“I am not that short,” Ruri pouted as she complained.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4Wasnq8wI
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I giggled. Ruri was short. And just like Mika, she didn’t like being called short. But when she pouted, I felt strings being pulled inside my heart. And while she was pouting, my fingers couldn’t resist gently pinching both her cheeks and carefully pulling them a bit so I wouldn’t hurt her.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsa6WMoRxob
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“Eergh,” Ruri’s cute voice made a sound while I gave in to what my hands wanted on her cheeks. “Ee, hurz,” she mumbled.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOa9OBoSbuk
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I let go of her cheeks then softly rubbed them.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwL9xtMeuyp
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“Sorry~” I said with a bit of glee.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqBIxk7fbw
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“Mmmnnnnn.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSk5909XGT
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Ruri quickly buried her face into my chest in frustration then pulled away just as quickly. She looked at me. I saw the animation of her eyebrows slowly trying to touch each other. I knew she was being suspicious. I just smiled at her, somehow I thought she was just going to be silly.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0AD55AyG3
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“Are you going to go on a date?” she asked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4oNQ1EYA2
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Okay, she wasn’t going to be silly after all.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMnPvp1eKO
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“N-no, I said I am going to go study, right?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnIGggIHJx
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“But you're going out too early, and Mika-nee is not here telling you to hurry…” Ruri never stopped her interrogation. “Hii-chan told me her older sister goes out early too, when she’s going on a date.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJt27eNCbK
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“I’m not going on a date, I promise.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5l7gjyAKWL
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“Then let me come with you.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSEWMnnGlO
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“I can’t, I’m sorry.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPURRPVu8d
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“Why?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsyZzKBBmV
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I replied to all of Ruri’s demands as gently as I could. But if she started to be like this, it was going to be hard to convince her. She always wanted things to go her way. And I was to be blamed. I turned her into this. Into the cute, selfish, little monster that she had become. Adorable. Precious. Lovely.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrOtNBzQjp
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“I’m sorry, Ruri. I really can’t take you with me.” I tried. I knew I would fail.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOODpM4kCnL
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“Nooooooooooo. I wanna come, I want to. Stay. Please. Ru-nee.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04fQByWj9f
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And there it went. Ruri’s tantrums. She was flailing her hands and feet on my lap. She was being difficult. But I couldn’t really make her stop. I wouldn’t want to get angry at her. I wouldn’t. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvTtSp2BJ7
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I sighed. But I smiled.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjaXDocV0Bz
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“I’m telling Mom that you have a boyfriend,” Ruri said after she stopped her tantrums.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1r7KKrAwTL
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My eyes became wide.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxny5C6zwc
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“No,” I said. “I’m not going on a date.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXpdHIgjYzh
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“You are,” she insisted.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKfjDEBxjb
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I opened my mouth but I couldn’t say anything. She was going to tell Mom no matter what. I had to think first before saying anything.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7VpKx32cO
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“Uh, Ruri, well. I promise okay? I am going to play with you when I get home,” I negotiated. I hoped this would work. “Just don’t tell Mom anything unnecessary. And I don’t have a boyfriend.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaA3eUqiwM
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“Really?” she asked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBRJylPkY7
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“Yes,” I nodded as I answered. I took a quick glance at the clock hanging above my door. Eight thirty-six.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCKSNkawFZ
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I patted her hair and let her down from my lap.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojB15Su1iI
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“Onee-chan is about to go now, wait for me, alright?” I continued.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrXqCJzJV8u
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She wasn’t saying anything, she was just looking at me. I didn’t really know how to take that. But I was supposed to arrive at Kuroiwa’s apartment at nine in the morning. And I was definitely going to be late.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqve9zm13A
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I stood up and Ruri went out running before me. I grabbed my shoulder bag without looking at it. I held it with my hand as I stepped out of my room and closed the door that she left open then hurriedly went down the stairs. She was standing below the stairs, right across the doorway of the living room. As soon as I arrived at the entrance, I placed my shoulder bag beside me, and started putting on my sandals. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5dIB8gZn1
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Ruri shouted towards Mom.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQm0uAfT5K
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“Mom! Ru-nee is going to go on a date with her boyfriend!” Ruri declared.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtJRava6CHS
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I looked at her briefly, eyes wide open. But I didn’t have any time left so I finished tying the last knot of my sandal as fast as I could. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ988jmcnRdt
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And then I heard Mom.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioQi25uJP7
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“What?” It came from the kitchen.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡln7OOmyFFY
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“He’s not my boyfriend!” I shouted back. “I’m leaving, I’ll be back before dinner!!” I grabbed my bag and went out running from the house before Mom had a chance to interrogate me again like last night. I felt something fall out from my bag by the entrance while I was still inside, but I had no time to look back.
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9:16 am.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrXnsvpMFj
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The optics from my eyes coldly coated the entrance of the lobby with their sadness. Their glimmer carefully left as they caressed the floor which made the place seem darker. A small portion of it softly graced my breaths with sighs. And in the corner was where I sat at that moment to be diligent as I waited. Light spilled through the main door whenever it opened for the few people that were coming and going, allowing me to hear the sounds of their shoes as they bathed in my own silence. Sullenly. Pitifully.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfP2rLzkIh
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I embraced my knees as I sat down quietly.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7s4wuExZ7
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I arrived at Kuroiwa’s apartment on time, even early. When I rang the intercom, no one was answering. And on top of that, when I searched for my phone in my shoulder bag, it was open this whole time. Then I remembered something had fallen out when I was hurrying to leave the house.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzm4I5nPRpj
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Everything was going wrong. Everything was totally wrong.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MOziupBco
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I sighed. Then I buried my face into my knees.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCesoGKfkHy
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Besides, where did Kuroiwa even go? He told me to come here at nine and he was the one missing.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhlsTR9M80
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…Or was he ignoring me?109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkyipg8ALt
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My eyes twitched a little.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzckqk5vVAT
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I didn’t care anymore. Exams, studying, taking notes, top ten… all of it. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t know what was happening. He just let me wait for him like this. Whenever people passed by, all I could do was just turn my head away from their gaze, pretending I couldn’t see them. Because not seeing them made me feel like they were not seeing me.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKktIS1mls
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I sighed again and dug deeper beneath my knees.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRhLAsumY1
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If he made me wait a little longer, he would definitely hear a lot of words from me. I’ll try to be angry, at least.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzw7VvzrzXE
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…I’ll give him five more minutes…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCesOBN7whA
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…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1UZ8fhXf5
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…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsnBrjRH4R
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I had nothing to do. I was bored. I couldn’t even watch any videos to pass time. Five minutes was too long.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKFVOPbYTd
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Kuroiwa Rei!!!109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceAH25KpeS
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I shouted his name inside my thoughts while I stood up. I looked at the main entrance of the building trying to summon him by the automated door. With my eyes!109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50vnhAtjIh
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Then it opened…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGbSvKqxiL
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Hmm?109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBH2JwA4L9R
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Then a shadow…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNubG3TTis
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I tilted my head.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOCPOciS10
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Then it was him slowly entering the building…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGePycruoo
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It worked?109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8a75neLqnZ
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“Hey!” I said without meaning to. “Where have you been?” I sharpened my tone, as it was softer the first time.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsz2IvSr25
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrOLpCeISa
Kuroiwa stopped when he heard me. He turned his head toward me and just stared. I stared back. I furrowed my eyebrows. I tried my best to out intimidate this guy with intimidating eyes. I was not going to lose. Not after what just happened.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3i8pyn6qDC
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgfOK3zQEB
…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj79mC1Ynu0
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…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj07J1KaZw7
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“The English word ‘Complicated’, what does it mean?” he asked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKmpsqxhO8
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I blinked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1x6U45t1Bs
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Was he really going to do this right now? In the lobby? Where people would come and go, and the possibility of an awkward situation appearing because we were just standing here looking at each other's eyes, and somebody could pass by us, and I would get embarrassed because I had been here for twenty minutes.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzDfRZNUx9
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88vaTwWHBW
“Why are you asking me this now?” I whispered. I leaned forward to Kuroiwa even though we were a few feet apart. I didn’t need to whisper, but I felt that I really had to.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqDaUi9Um8y
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhElU7pShC
“Just answer the question,” he demanded with his usual flat voice.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMh917nCCB
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I had to deal with an incredibly cute stubborn person earlier today.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39GdYSDS0M
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UXgmu5Y8r
Do I really have to deal with another one?109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTKXPyLJpnZ
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A worse one, even…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vXV2t8QJF
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“I-I don’t know,” I answered while straying away from his gaze.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEr8phQ8s6
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhMVAQz58R
“It means… hard to understand, explain or to deal with,” he said. “Can you use it in an English sentence?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHBWS0n4I4
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Ugh…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAyTulckAS
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“You… uhh… umm… you.. kom.. kom-pu-li… kom-pu-li-kay-ted-o.” I mustered all the knowledge of English I knew into answering Kuroiwa’s question. “You, kom-pu-li-kay-ted-o.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4H01cvkVkb
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV0HHvjVhT
I gave him my sharpest look. And we went back to staring at each other's eyes.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAvUG9ergr
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“Close enough,” he said. “Let’s go.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡupNkLPP9eB
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPexoicuFX
He started to walk towards the intercom. And there was when I noticed he was holding two plastic bags in each hand. They seemed to be filled with ingredients. Some fish, some vegetables, some fruits, some eggs and some beverages that I couldn’t see because they were at the bottom.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0OLGfScTr
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“Do you need help?” I offered.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWpyGxBUgl
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Kuroiwa looked at me then slowly raised his hand to give me the plastic bag with the vegetables and eggs in it. But when I was about to take it from him he stepped back leading me to grab air instead.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcazlR0gTRe
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What just happened? I thought.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMvaZqdLKZ
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“I’m sorry,” Kuroiwa said, then bent himself to place the plastic bag on the floor. After he stood back up he continued to walk toward the intercom.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡToJKA3om74
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqa3jCH9LDw
I just followed him with my eyes. All the irritation I had been feeling up to this point was quickly replaced by something else. I bit my lip briefly and walked toward the plastic bag, bent down, and took it with my hand. After I stood up straight, the inner door opened.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeV9azDDOIU
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoiSzOmusm
“Hurry,” Kuroiwa said as he stepped in first.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkPDCpP2Wu
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ66wUCIOXi
I jogged behind Kuroiwa and slowed down when I got in. The door closed behind us and I was just in time. We walked toward the elevator which was waiting for us on the ground floor. I peeked inside before we got in and no one was there. So, that meant it would just be Kuroiwa and me inside. We boarded. Kuroiwa shifted to the side as I settled myself in the corner.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfyUTScL8d
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“Do you cook?” I asked, because even though the elevator would reach the fifth floor rather fast, I didn’t want an elevator ride with someone to be surrounded by silence.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OaznmMReA
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“Sometimes,” Kuroiwa answered.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AbYv9oMsE
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“Do you often go out to buy ingredients yourself?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mOyYiEyam
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“No.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1YroW1GJTh
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“…Do you like vegetables?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeCtCfSfuu
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“Yes.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsD0Vn0yB5T
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One word reply for each question. I sighed, but I was not yet ready to give up.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lPJPzEgUR
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIxmQWup5L
“So, are you going to cook today?” I continued.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOugY7ih0yO
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“Probably.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgkbprQ0p8
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSyq9yvn6fx
…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpm88dzvbP
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“What are we going to study today?” I asked the question that I knew would get more than a one word answer from Kuroiwa.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiY3TSld3e
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“English, Japanese literature and science.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLQiYqOv6P
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I got five words from that.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdRNIqOYom
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I’ll take it.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbJN1JivpN
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As soon as the elevator door opened, the conversation hung in the air. We stepped out. Kuroiwa in front of me, still not initiating anything to talk about. I slowed down my steps behind him, otherwise, if I continued with the way I always walked, I would bump into him.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5B7kXQrWt5
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That would be awkward, I thought.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc8LJortzLu
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I didn’t understand anything at all. Last night was completely different than what just happened in the elevator. After we left the ramen shop, I walked beside Kuroiwa, even when there was distance between us, but the silence, the warmth I had just witnessed inside the ramen shop somehow bridged a different gap. And we talked. And I had so many things I had asked… if he ever watched anime or read manga, if he played video games, what kind of video games he played, what were his favorites. I wasn’t interested in any of them, but I asked anyway because of how he engaged and answered everything.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidlxGUDSTF
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyDg81eILW
I asked about things that I was interested in. Like if Kuroiwa liked cakes, what was his favorite food, and what was his favorite dessert. I asked if he liked going out during the weekends to shop, for clothes, for accessories, or spotting things he would want to buy in the future. I asked his opinions about TV dramas, if he ever watched one before, if he ever was curious to watch one. I even recommended my favorite drama that I watched years ago.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTsHDYoE3Bn
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJlDZry9FNl
Kuroiwa’s answers had not been limited to just one word. He would answer the questions with a yes, no, maybe, perhaps, or probably, but he would always offer more words to elaborate on them.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1emzqacRqQ
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwxDck0VEa
I would tease Kuroiwa about his eyes and I’d laugh. Then I suggested that glasses would suit him perfectly fine. He would nod, but somehow that nod was enough. I had so much to ask him, to talk with him about, but I was not able to ask everything because we had to resume studying. Last night, I felt like we were conversing, not just talking. But right now, it felt like the opposite.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ473dMxp2FF
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I couldn’t find those questions I had last night right now, they just… vanished. And I didn’t really know what to ask next.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUrvmQw2uN
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I thought I understood what Hina said yesterday during gym class, but maybe I didn’t. Maybe I didn’t need to know more about Kuroiwa. Maybe this gap between us was enough. Maybe there was a line that was drawn in that space... a line that I never was supposed to cross. Maybe I should stay behind that line and never reach out.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJYZ97xIl5
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…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFTvDPG0GGR
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But then again, I wouldn’t want to spend hours of studying alone with a boy I couldn’t figure out.
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ29yOJhKrhP
…
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And also, it was not like we suddenly got close afterwards either. Why am I even bothered about this anyway? It was just Kuroiwa being Kuroiwa after all.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5udEa4Mat
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I took a deep breath.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJw7VXgtzj0
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I shouldn’t really jump to conclusions that fast. If I really wanted to learn more about him, then I had to be patient. One night would not produce any results. It was just the beginning.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqju9rFqBW2
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I didn’t realize that I was looking down that whole time, so when I noticed, I lifted my head to look forward.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEdJllEJLHi
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I blinked, twice, three times.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QF803i4gZ
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Kuroiwa was not in front of me. I looked at the doors.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXvH1GHW0Aj
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508, 509, 510.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IZfTCCmoF
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Hmm?109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsyniCsAGo
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I didn’t want to admit what I just did. So I reluctantly turned around. And there he was. Kuroiwa, who stood in front of the door of his apartment, which apparently he had already opened. He was just watching me move forward, silently...109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbTYavZ7j93
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I walked back. My steps got heavy as I approached Kuroiwa. I tried to be calm while I walked but as soon as I appeared in front of him my eyebrows furrowed by themselves and I leaned closer to him.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPRpwfGbQV
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“Why did you not stop me?” I stared into his eyes. I didn’t remember them being this close.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCkvUiFsfz
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“You’re too close,” he said. He didn’t move backward to avoid me or even flinch but I realized that I had closed the gap that we had not officially agreed on but maintained since last night.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOWoJ2hXlM
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I got flustered and was the one to step back. I stopped glaring at him and hid my face to the side because of the sudden warmth I felt over my cheeks. I was worried the colors they would show were not from the makeup, but from a natural blood flow.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRB5WaSctcP
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“You should have stopped me and said something when I passed your apartment,” I said, quieter this time but my tone remained firm.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrieECilbT
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“Sorry,” he just replied.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFuVdknC3Q
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I really had to be more attentive when I was around this guy. I was too spoiled by my friends that they would just call me out before I could embarrass myself in public. Luckily, there was no one in the hallway except for Kuroiwa and me.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRCrHZOtQ9
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“It’s fine,” I said as I gave up. I surrendered to the fate that the gods who chose to watch over me. To the fate they had already drawn for me with this guy.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBgYEBZjVa2
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuz86rm2WAQ
We moved into his apartment, same hallway inside, same living room. But this time I headed to his kitchen intending to help Kuroiwa arrange what he just brought with him when he went out.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7WERBJJLt
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“You can just wait for me in the living room,” Kuroiwa said.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ76vGQC6nIl
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“You sure?” I asked.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYCpswF2oy
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Kuroiwa nodded.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRq5wDGF1I6
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I guess, if Kuroiwa said he didn’t need my help then there was no reason for me to stay in the kitchen. I carefully placed the plastic bag I was carrying on top of his dining table and was about to head toward the living room.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCh30ZMQNNK
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLiL68FA8K
“What do you want for a drink?” Kuroiwa asked before I was able to make a full turn toward the living room.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzj3KAuSH7
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I turned my head to face him. “Soda,” I said. I had asked for soda twice already so I felt like I had to commit.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppgLaksx8K
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDpYCJzSAUG
Kuroiwa dug inside the plastic bag he brought. He placed every item on top of the dining table until only the beverages were left. He looked inside for a moment.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDjOVVz41Z1
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“Sorry, I forgot to buy one. Either water or juice, but the juice would still not be cold.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqwRTJxDNg
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKy0cxM3sPZ
Seriously…109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCXP8Q0u0b
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“I’ll have water then,” I said. “Can I get it myself?”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoLioq2bDZ
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“Sure, inside the fridge there should still be some bottles of water left. You can transfer them to a glass if you want.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOiw1d1E9DH
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“I’ll just take a bottle.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGd9vVXQwyS
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“Okay.”109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrCfKSmsDz
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I walked toward his fridge and opened it. Except for about ten bottles of water inside, it was mostly empty. No wonder he went to buy groceries. But did he have to wait until his fridge is as empty as this to go buy groceries? 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1aTkf1iqa
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I shook that thought in my mind. I felt like the answer should be an obvious yes, and I didn’t want to bother myself asking the next question, which is ‘why’.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUz6HBz21I
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKRUOFsjHM
I grabbed one bottle then proceeded to the living room.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEpBlEeDtU
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My instincts told me to sit on my usual spot on the longer sofa, but I didn’t come here to be comfortable. I came here to study. Instead I sat in front of the study table, placed the bottle of water on the fabric coaster that was still on the table, placed my bag beside me, and took out the notebooks I brought with me inside my bag. I sorted them on top of the table.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWceWNjgZr
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Kuroiwa asked me an English question earlier, so I guessed we would start with English. I took a peek at him to see what he was doing. He was still organizing his groceries, taking his time. Slow.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIKr0KGbO8
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflL2sUoQap
I let out a breath, closed my eyes and pouted. He clearly needed my help to organize them faster.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9wro6n5Hq
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I turned my attention to the table, after all, it is what he wanted.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9iLuPwFSQ
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWoljeEyoK
I reached toward the English notebook Kuroiwa wrote for me, flipped the cover, and began studying by myself first.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWDpvCYGeTb
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I didn’t know what this day would bring to me. I had my adorable little sister telling Mom I was going on a date that I wasn’t. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTDP6HHg97
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Seriously, it’s not a date! We’re just here to study. 109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeh8R9zoDF7
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I also had my phone fall out of my bag. I had to awkwardly sit in the corner of the entrance lobby of this apartment for twenty minutes. And I had to walk past Kuroiwa’s apartment because I was not paying attention.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxGJof8n7m
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I already knew. This day would be different.109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmcwCC8tCd
109Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9mjuC7m3X
So, as I continued to read each letter inside the notebook, I was also mentally preparing myself for another long day that was about to come
and then Add to home screen.