Dear Diary,
This isn't the first time I've been robbed. Nor my second nor third. But now marks it's all. Forget playing kind for one another. Forget playing, influencing the ones whom was seeking for hope. Forget those whom play as role models. Forget those whom seem like real people but in reality are your foes.
Nothing is going to calm me down for this one. Despair is going to fear me. For the one's whom stole from me. I hope your life reaches to your standards while also having thoughts saying, "Was it worth it, was it worth putting the ones down to make you happy?" Instead of you pathetic, useless, non-existent person and I don't even think one of my worst foes could even see this coming.
The amount of hatred I have right now can fuel a palace full of roaring warriors. No amount of forgetting is going to make me not forget the unenviable. And I'm not a materialist person whom cherishes material things. Because being realistic when you're on your death bed where you lie with family and friends you expect no phones, no tablet, no electronics only electronics that are surrounding you is the heart monitor. And that's even if your brain doesn't acknowledge it after a while because the constant beeping will eventually fade out. Skies will be brighter and days will be longer but what isn't long is the sunset and the sunrise.
The amount of time I've been looking for what I was either given or bought with hard earned money and not just that but born with is all taken advantage of, or stolen or manipulated is ridiculous. I shan't taint you in the name of Jesus but I am no god. I am some mortal who is only here to talk to the ones whom are here to listen to what I wrote.
I had 2 clear visions of me. The 1st one is me searching and giving up, the second one is me holding a pistol in my hand, cocked it back and aimed it at the people whom stole it all and waited for the police to arrive. But I am no person seeking vengeance nor a person whom seeking to give up something that I've used my breath or time to waste.
Such powerful words aren't going to serve any difference in the near future. If anything it will shower me with more rage and more violent thoughts along with the constant vision. The vision that I've just envisioned that I integrated the person that I assume stole what I've been looking for. Just for the case to be unsolved and one solved. It's like you back a thought in your head saying I lost it somewhere and start blaming to cope on what you've lost and unfortunately that's what it seems like. But meanwhile with the other thought it's that you've found it and have a relief.
Like how my mother said, "Why should I drop everything to help you if you didn't do the same for me?" And that I don't but do know. But it's like going through the same situations but with a different path and a different beginning but with the same ending. And that's getting what you were wishing for just for it to not be what you thought and wished for. Or maybe it's exactly how u vision it how it used to be.
The disgust that I have for the ones shall be blessed. They shall be known as a traditor in their own unique way. The amount of hospitality I give to those whom seek mortality just for those whom misuses them and misguide them to something that I've created. Like I said I'm no god I'm a human whom listens and acknowledges what the lord is showing me what to do. I'm a person whom you talk to and get along with. Not a person whom is known as a "bad influence" which no one shall be known as.
What I hope for my foes is to stay out of my way and don't interfere if so. Please let yourself be known and say it loud and bright for the ones whom want to listen.
60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfisEdC7Xqy
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