THREE: AFTERTHOUGHTS
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The taxi ride home for the three of them was mostly silent, but brief. They all three conveniently share a small apartment right outside of campus. When they got home, Levi quickly found himself heading straight to the shower. He appreciated the quiet, allowing himself a few peaceful moments to ponder. As he tried to silence his mind, his thoughts ran wild with questions. He let the steam of the hot shower envelop him. He stood still under that stream of water and stared at the bathroom wall. He wondered so many things; he was completely distracted. He wondered about you, where you came from, and what happened to you that led to the decisions you made that night. He wondered if he was just seeing things when he thought he saw bruises.
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When Levi had opened up his eyes underwater in search of your sinking frame, the sight was similar to oblivion until he was able to drag you closer to him. In the slowest second he had ever experienced in his whole life, right before he had pulled you close to his chest, his eyes caught a glimpse of your lowest rib as your shirt was lifted by the water.
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-Discolored.
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He'd convinced himself it was a hallucination. It was a brief and frantic moment underwater, and his eyes had been blurred and misled by not only water but by the instinct to survive. He pulls his gaze away from the wall in that steamed, foggy room after realizing he'd been zoned out for too long. You didn't have bruises; he was wrong. You weren't a tragedy, you were an idiot. An ungrateful fool needing rescue. How stupid?
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“Tsk,” he let out a hard scoff, and moved on.
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The stupidest thought Levi had ever experienced in his entire life ran through his brain like an electric bolt. He physically pounds his palm to his forehead, shoving his head back onto the wall behind him. He was an idiot, a stupid fool.
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" Was she ……………………. .pretty? ‘
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Levi grabs the shampoo bottle with a death grip. He moves along with his cleaning ritual, shutting off his brain in an attempt to forget about the shitshow that was this night. Considering Levi's strict routine with every task he runs through in his day-to-day life, this was a long shower. Too much thought consumed him, along with his time.
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Some time later, three knocks on his door rang loud in his ears. He startles, alert to face the door from the seat of his desk.
“Yeah, what? “
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“Hey, Levi…can I come in? “ Hange murmurs already in the act of pushing the door open with a soft creak made by the hinges.
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“What do you want, four eyes? “
“I just- are you okay? You know, after everything today?”
“Yeah, fine. Why, what do you want?”
“Just that it was a lot, and I know how you compartmentalize. You know, you did well today. You know that, right?”
“Whatever, just leave, dumbass. Can I study in peace, please?”
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“Fine, but, just saying, she was kind- she was sweet, and we exchanged numbers. I'm hoping the two of us can become friends. I would love to have her be a part of my life, and I know it may even give you some closure to-.”
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“Ugh, dumbass, I don't care. Just leave, please. And don't make a mess in the kitchen if you're gonna cook late again, you hear?”
“Oh Levi, nighty night, my bitter friend!!!” Skipping out of the room and closing the door, Hange walks away feeling accomplished enough.
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Levi would never say it, but he was grateful as fuck for a friend like Hange. They sometimes, rarely, but every now and then, they said just what he was longing to hear. However, ‘ don't they know it would be awkward as hell for everyone involved to see you again? ‘- A thought that certainly crossed his mind. With a deep sigh and the desire to ignore the disaster of an evening he had had, he turned his attention back to the open books on his desk.
“ Damn Hange. “
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Erwin had already retired to his quarters for the night. He sat in a large desk chair across from an L-shaped desk littered with books. He looked up to the bookshelf containing rows and rows filled to the brim with stories of history and education. He was wide awake; today had been eventful. He felt a large amount of guilt that he wasn't used to. He remembers the way he was so engaged with Hange, awaiting and anticipating the moment he could allow his input to be called upon. He'd never felt so ashamed to have been distracted, knowing he could have done much more. He questioned his own spatial awareness and his instincts altogether. He wondered why he, knowing better, had abandoned them. He pondered what he would have said to you had he gotten there when he was supposed to. Would it have mattered? - Anything was better than nothing. He closed the book outstretched on the desk and reached for another. His brain was too addled for sleep; it'd be a long night of gruesome studies.
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Hange, with a lack of a better explanation, was ‘a man with a plan. ‘
They skipped around the kitchen mixing ingredients, hoping for the result of some sort of baked good; maybe sugar cookies? Yeah, Hange was surely going to find a great friend within you. If what you needed was some light in your life, then they were here for that. If joy was lacking in your heart, then they were certain they could help this time. They could never forget your sweet, somber voice, and surely you'd meet again. As they hopped around the kitchen, they started dreaming up tactics for the proper when and way they'd soon message you. A new mission reared its head; Hange saw light in the beautiful new friendship they'd create. Yeah, everything will work accordingly, and somehow it was figured that that run-in was fate. Hange speaks their own personal mantra aloud,
“ Everything happens as it's supposed to! “
Chipper, and sure of themself, they were excited for whatever the future held.
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A week had passed……
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and then Add to home screen.