Saturday September 27th
Trinity hospital, 2 pm
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The Kiltons and the Coopers had planned a visit to Miss Lewis in the early afternoon of Saturday. She was still in hospital but she was recovering quickly and the doctors planned to release her the next Tuesday after a check-up.
When they arrived, they found Father Mark who was talking to Alison. When he saw the two families enter, he stood up from the chair where he was sitting. Louise and Meg embraced the priest they had known for a few years, who they loved. Alison was visibly happy to see Andy. He was the one who went to the bed to embrace her,
“Alison, I am so happy to see you are recovering! I was so sad when they told me about the attack. How are you?” Alison smiled and said,
“Now that I see you out of prison I am much, much better, thanks. I was so worried for you, Andy!” Louise and Meg came near the bed and they shook hands politely with the lady, followed by Isabel and Grace.
Andy asked, “How is your mum? Have you been able to call her?”
Father Mark said, “I went to visit her yesterday and she was worried because she had not seen her daughter. We have just called her and now she is relieved because she has heard Alison’s voice and she is comforted by the thought that Alison is better and will soon be able to visit her.”
“Father Mark, you must promise me to tell Detective Grant that I will pay him back as soon as I am out of hospital!” Alison said with emotion in her voice. She turned to the other visitors and said, “The detective saw the bill from the nursing home on my table the day after the aggression and he paid it for me! Who says that he is cold and detached?”
Father Mark smiled and replied, “I know he has this reputation here in Trinity because people know that he has arrested dangerous criminals in Toronto and all over Canada and because, when they meet him in town, he is always serious and of few words. He is certainly detached and tough with criminals but never with victims and,” he added, “knowing him as I do, he wouldn’t like you to tell everyone what he has done, Miss Lewis!”
She laughed and said, “Oh, but I will tell everybody, I don’t care if he doesn’t like it! But Father, he has such a sad look in his eyes, even when he smiles. I hope he doesn’t have a sick relative or something like that!”
Father Mark sighed at the thought of the tragedy that had struck twice the life of his friend, he thought that it was high time someone made that sad look disappear.
He replied to Miss Lewis, “Every person has his or her cross to carry, big or small, heavy or light, Miss Lewis, and Detective Grant has been carrying his cross for a few years now.” He left it at that. “Now I have to go back to my Parish, Alison. Remember, you promised to come to church one of the next Sundays,” he added with a smile.
Alison replied, “I will remember my promise, Father, thanks for your support and for visiting my mum.”
Father Mark said goodbye to Alison and her visitors and left.
Joseph Kilton approached the bed now and said, “Miss Lewis, I am really sorry for what my brother has done to you. I have already told Andy and I want to tell you that I intend to take over Kilton Motor Company. My father founded it many years ago and I decided to leave because I didn’t get on with Brian. But now I want to manage it as my dad would have liked, without secret dealings and threats. I hope you will be my secretary, Miss Lewis.” Alison couldn’t believe it. In the past few days, she had been worried about her job and she had endured Brian Kilton’s rude behaviour for many years because she needed her salary, but now… With watery eyes and a voice choked by emotion, she was just able to say,
“Thanks, Mr Kilton. Thanks so much.”
The Kiltons and the Coopers remained for some time to keep the lady company, chatting about what had happened, but mostly, about plans for the future and the celebration of Andy and Grace’s anniversary in two weeks.
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***
Miriam's home, 5 pm
Miriam was really sad; she had hoped Jason would come to her or at least call her but it was Saturday afternoon and she had not heard from him yet. It was the first time she had felt this way. In her life, she had had a few boyfriends, but evidently, she had never found the real love of her life. What was happening now with a man she hardly knew? What did she see in Jason that she had not seen in any other man? He had been very kind, it is true, he had even saved her life thanks to his readiness but he had also refused to answer her calls.
She was confused and restless, and before the evening mass, she decided to go for a walk at the lake. Walking had always succeeded in soothing her. She put on jeans and a light sweater, she took her bag and she left her home. She didn’t know why but she had refused Julian’s invitation to go to the cinema with him that evening, she just didn’t feel like being with other people, not that evening.
She started to walk on the path that bordered the lake. The days were getting shorter and it was not so warm, but it was a pleasant late afternoon and the autumn leaves became golden in the sun. She was walking briskly and looking distractedly at the lake when she heard her name, but… that voice, “Miriam!” She turned and instinctively clutched the wedding ring hanging from her neck as if to ask for her dad’s help because she knew this would be one of the most important moments in her life.
Jason stood there, smiling shyly at her, with his blazer in his hands, wearing a shirt with rolled-up sleeves and jeans, no gun, no badge. He seemed even taller, more handsome and his dark blue eyes reflected the light of the afternoon sun. Miriam’s heart started to beat faster, she stopped and he caught up with her.
“I have just been to your home but you were not there. I saw the car parked so I imagined you had not gone far and I know this path is really pleasant…” He stopped, and looking at her, all his doubts faded.
“Miriam, can we sit down for a moment?” He pointed at a bench but she thought she preferred the intimacy of her home.
“Jason, you didn’t drink that coffee last Monday. What about coming to me for a good Italian coffee now?” she smiled and wondered if he would refuse, considering his behaviour in the last few days, but he simply replied, “I think it’s a good idea, Miriam.”
The walk back to her home seemed interminable to both of them, they were both thinking what to say next and they were both absorbed in their feelings.
Miriam opened the door to her bungalow and let Jason in. She went silently to the living room and she invited Jason to sit on the sofa. She sat on the armchair next to it. She was so agitated she completely forgot the coffee.
Jason sat on the edge of the sofa and looked at her for some moments.
“Miriam, what I am going to tell you is something only Father Mark knows. Miriam, I am really ashamed of my behaviour in the last few days.” Miriam looked at him and waited. “In reality, I behaved like a fool because I realized when I came to you last Monday that… that you are a wonderful woman, you are sensitive, considerate, reserved… I… I… I am growing fond of you, Miriam!”
Miriam was afraid she would faint because she realized she had been waiting for these words. It seemed as if the world had suddenly stood still, there was no Canada, Italy, Trinity, Padua, just the two of them. She couldn’t talk, she just waited for him to go on. She felt that what he would say next was costing him very much. She didn’t want to press him or make him more nervous. She knew he would speak when he felt like it.
“Miriam, when I discovered, when I felt I was growing… falling in love with you I was afraid. Six years ago something terrible happened to me, you see that it is difficult for me to talk about it even now.”
He lowered his gaze for a few moments and Miriam instinctively sat down beside him on the sofa and took his hands. She wanted to make him feel that she was there for him, that she would comfort him.
He looked straight ahead and started to speak almost mechanically, as if he was trying to detach himself from what he was saying.
“When I was seventeen my mother and father told me that I would have a little sister. I was so happy,” he smiled as he recalled those joyful moments. “My sister Anna was seven and I was twenty-four, I had just become a policeman when my parents both died in a car accident.” Miriam blinked back the tears that were coming to her eyes.
“I was left with a little sister, and at first, I thought that it would be a problem, I had a job, friends, a girlfriend. Father Mark always helped me during that period. Instead, Anna was the greatest joy of my life. She was a sweet child and then a sensitive teenager, she adored me and I adored her.” ‘That’s why he is so kind to teenage girls,’ Miriam thought. “It was wonderful to see her grow up. We were really happy, she prepared breakfast for me on Sundays, we went to baseball games together and she liked playing volleyball! She always understood when I was worried and sad and I always saw when she had something on her mind. I often told Mark that she was a gift that my parents had left me. We lived in Toronto then and Father Mark directed the school where both Anna and I studied.”
He turned and looked at Miriam. He was amazed at how easily words came to him now.
“Yes, Miriam, Anna is the pretty girl in the photo on my desk! Here in Trinity, only my colleagues at the police station know what happened. I saw Hogan watch the picture on my desk once or twice but he has never dared to ask me or to say anything, even if I know he sympathizes with me. “
Now came the part that was more difficult for Jason and Miriam imagined a tragedy had happened.
“When she was twenty, I took part in a raid to arrest a serial killer who had murdered several women. There was a shooting and I saw he was going to kill one of my agents, so I shot and killed him.” He bent his head and stopped. Miriam caressed his hand that was still in hers. He turned and said sadly, “Don’t think that being a policeman, I am used to killing people. It is something hard to accept for me even now, even when the victim is a serial killer who has murdered innocent women and even children.”
Miriam instinctively caressed Jason's face and she waited patiently for the worst part that, she knew, was yet to come.
Jason sighed deeply and went on, “That serial killer had a brother, a gangster we have not been able to arrest yet. He is a very cunning man, he has connections and a lot of people who cover him. One day, I went home after work and…” this was really too much even for a tough man like Jason. He had to stop and he started sobbing. Miriam told him,
“I imagine the rest, Jason. I am so sorry!” Tears were coming down her cheeks too.
“I found my sister in a pool of blood on the porch of my home and a message written on a piece of paper, ‘Now we are even!’” Miriam couldn’t restrain herself any longer and she embraced him. They remained like that for minutes, they were both crying but Jason was feeling a strange sense of relief because he had finally been able to tell someone what had happened.
After a time, time meant nothing for them now, Jason gently freed himself from Miriam’s embrace.
He looked at her with tearful eyes and kindly wiped her tears from her face.
“I am sorry, Miriam,” he tried to smile and said, “This is not what is usually meant for a first date!” He sat back on the sofa and continued to talk, always holding Miriam’s hand, “That gangster had an alibi and we were not able to pin my sister’s murder on him, even if I am sure he was responsible or behind Anna’s death. At that period, I had had a girlfriend for some time; she got on well with my sister and I thought it was something serious, but after the death of Anna she moved away from me little by little. I couldn’t and I cannot blame her, I was really devastated and I imagine it was difficult to stand beside me. I let her go and from that moment I promised myself never to have relationships in my life because I am afraid I could put the people I love in danger. This is why I instinctively avoided you.” Now he looked at her with a troubled face, “Furthermore, Miriam, we have not been able to catch that bastard yet. Excuse me, but I cannot find another way to define him. I will never be at rest until I have arrested him!”
Miriam looked at him sadly and replied, “Jason, I am so sorry for your sister. You must have been a wonderful brother.” Oh, how she wished she had had a sister like that; caring and affectionate. “But if that gangster said, ‘Now we are even!’ maybe he means he has completed his revenge, or whatever that shameful murder is for him, maybe he will not try to hurt you or your dear ones any more.”
Jason shook his head and reflected for a few moments before answering, “Maybe you are right, but my job is dangerous and can put the lives of the people around me in danger anyway. I still have the feeling that my sister would still be alive if I hadn’t been a policeman. The fact is that I deal with the worst unscrupulous criminals, being the head of the Homicide Department. What am I to do, Miriam? I don’t want to put your life in danger but I can’t live without seeing you and the more I tried to tell myself that I had to keep to myself, the more I wanted to come here and talk to you. You understand my trouble, don’t you?”
Miriam nodded but now she was smiling and she said, “Jason, you can’t stay isolated from the world. You can’t deny your feelings and you mustn’t blame yourself for what happened to your sister. It is not your fault!” She understood that now she had to talk about herself and she said, trying to keep her voice steady but betraying the emotion that almost prevented her from talking, “Jason, I arrived a month ago from Italy and I don’t even know if I will be confirmed in my job next year.” Jason smiled but didn’t say what Father Mark had told him. “But you are a wonderful man. I saw you with Meg that day, you are sensitive, professional and I know you have a big heart, you care for the people and you took care of a little sister…” she had to stop because her emotions were overwhelming her. “Jason, I want to get to know you better, I am really fond of you. I am feeling for you what I have never felt for any other man in my life. Jason, please, I don’t care if my life will be in danger, don’t give up on me, please! If there will be danger you will protect me, but give us a chance… Please!” she stopped and he looked at her with infinite tenderness. Now he could not back out, he could not keep her at a distance, now only Mark’s prayers could help them and preserve them from danger. As if Miriam had read his thoughts, she added, “And Jason, remember that we are religious and that I firmly believe that the Divine Providence will always help us if what we feel for each other is true!”
Jason said with force, “It is true, Miriam!” he leaned towards her and he gently kissed her lips. Then he embraced her tenderly and they remained lost in that embrace for… a few minutes? A quarter of an hour? Time meant nothing, there were only Jason and Miriam and their love.
After a time of tenderness, Jason turned to her and said, “But you haven’t said anything about you, about your family. You were so sad last Monday and I don’t know anything about your life, apart from the fact that you are a wonderful teacher.” He saw the troubled expression on Miriam’s face and he stopped, “Miriam, I have already saddened you enough today. If you don’t want to talk about it, if it is something that makes you suffer…” his voice trailed off because Miriam had gone to retrieve her bag. She went back to sit on the sofa next to him. She took out her father’s letter, knowing that Jason couldn’t read it because it was written in Italian, but she thought that it would help her to explain. She clutched the wedding ring and Jason said, “I have noticed you often touch that wedding ring, Miriam,” he was thinking maybe she was a widow.
Miriam raised her eyes and looked at him with love, “Jason, if you have found the courage to tell me what weighed on your heart, I will do the same. In fact, I am ashamed because I have not experienced a terrible tragedy like you. This ring,” she held it between her fingers and showed it to Jason, “belonged to my dad, or I should say to my stepfather.”
As it had been relatively easy for Jason to speak about his past, it was now for Miriam much less difficult than she had expected to explain the content of the letter and to talk about her stepmother and stepsister, considering that, since her dad’s death, Miriam had spoken to nobody about the letter, not to her colleagues or her friends in the parish. While she was talking, she had to stop a few times, overwhelmed by the emotion, and Jason kept on caressing her face, her hands and he looked at her with infinite tenderness. He didn’t say, as many people around her had done, that it was not possible, that her stepmother had certainly loved her. When she had finished she was crying with the emotion, for the longing for her dad to be there with her, for the bitterness that always pervaded her soul when she talked about Raffaella and her wickedness. Jason cradled her in his arms, waiting for her to calm down, without saying a word, but she felt he had understood, he was really sympathizing with her suffering for many years because of the lack of a real family, he was really sharing her pain with her as she had shared his desperation for a sister who had died so young, in such a cruel way.
Now that they had confessed what was in the bottoms of their hearts, they realized it was well past the evening mass Miriam had intended to attend. Miriam offered to prepare dinner and Jason accepted. The rest of the evening was spent serenely in the joy of being together. They talked about their job, about Italy, about the plans for the following weekends. Miriam showed Jason pictures of her dad and her hometown and they discovered that very evening that they enjoyed each other’s company, that they delighted in talking and in feeling the warmth of each other’s presence. This was really for Miriam and Jason, a new life!
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