1.
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“You seem like you could use a chair.”
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A thin man in a white veil was looking at a man sitting on a stool.
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“Uh…what?!”
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The man on the stool looked at the thin man. He noticed that the thin man was wearing a dress, also white. He looked up at his face and saw nothing but a veil covering his features.
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“Are you suuuureeee”
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The man’s voice sounded more feminine this time, more sultry and pleading.
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“It is a chair, after all.”
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“Get out!”
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A tall woman with a towel draped over her arm stood behind the communal table that the men were both sitting on.
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“Oh…I’m sorry to bother, miss.”
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The man sauntered out of the room, as if he didn’t just speak of a dangerous item. The dress billowed behind him. He opened the door to the pub, and paused for a second. He laughed and stepped out of the pub as it began to rain.
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When he had left, the man said the the bartender:
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“Can you believe what he offered me?! He offered me a chair?!”
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“Aye. Should’ve called some enforcers and got him proper arrested.”
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The door burst open, and a tall man with a scarf and red goggles stepped in. He was 7 feet tall and wearing boots made of steel. He immediately ran from where he entered and jumped onto the communal table and slapped the man to the ground. He kicked the bartender in the gut and jumped down next to her. He raised his boot up and stomped on her head, crushing it and shooting blood, brain, and skull all around his steel boot. The assailant circled around the table and grabbed the man by his jacket and threw him on the ground again. He than raised his steel boot again and thrusted it down on the man’s neck. It separated the man’s head from his body, completely obliterating his neck and leaving a soupy, bloody mess. The assailant quickly ran out of the pub.
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Outside, the assailant stood in the rain. The peculiar man from earlier strode up to him.
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“It looks like you had fun in there.”
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The assailant, whose face was completely obscured by the scarf and goggles, nodded.
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“Ahhhh. You did.”
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It began to rain heavily now. 4 mooses clopped down the street in their direction. The mooses stopped at the 2 men. They snorted angrily as 5 men and 1 woman stepped out of the Carrij (Big, moose-drawn room on wheels that barely fits in a street(Yes it is spelled right.)) They were all in white work shirts and were carrying long metal staffs with golden 8-balls on the ends. They were also carrying 8-balls. They went inside the pub and rolled their 8-balls. Each 8-ball had a varying answer in the range of yes, maybe, or no. Everyone did accordingly to what their 8-ball said. This left 2 in the pub, as they asked the 8-balls weather they were to stay in the pub. They then grabbed out matches and lit them. They left them on the ground and set the pub on fire. As the fire started to flare up, the remaining people got out of the building and got in the Carrij. The mooses snorted more and began to ride off.
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2.
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“G*mes.”
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Conrah had seen his fair share of murders before, but this one was strange. One of the victim’s heads was completely destroyed and reduced to a mushy pulp. The other had the same treatment, just instead his neck was destroyed rather than his head. Other than that, no other real injury was on the body, other than the neckless one being bruised. What kind of person kills someone like this? No weapon Conrah could think of just smashes things, unless it was incredibly time-consuming, but then why do it at all? Why not just use a board with nails in it? That works better. If you’re wearing the right gloves, and then smack someone in the back of the head with a board covered in nails, you could much more easily evade the enforcers. Conrah has been thinking about the perfect murder for quite some time and has always wondered why murderers were so stupid. Well, I guess this one wasn’t stupid; he did trick me. However, all of this trivial nonsense wasn’t for Conrah to worry about. He came to enforce, not play detective.
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Conrah stepped into his Pöłïce Bå (a Bå designed for enforcer work(a Bå is a small 4-person Carrij that is much cheaper, but more disappointing.)) the moose that was pulling the Pöłïce Bå snorted and treaded off. 95Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqsqgAzlAbm
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3.
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“Ok! Start up the Hyper-Anal Strøgwherfer 21 Gretafarg Xenocomprimiser!”95Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZJuAS7GCht
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Ellie did as she was told and flipped a large switch to a machine which can only be described as a Hyper-Anal Strøgwherfer 21 Gretafarg Xenocomprimiser. Next to her, on a bed, lay a limp body. It was limp because it was fake. The only real thing on the body was the soup of brain matter piled into a glass bowl. The top of the bowl was connected to a large metal brick. The brick was connected to the fake body, also metal.
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“Hey! Ya think it’s time to turn on the Phag-Manosoth Generator?”
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“Yes.”
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Ellie flipped a switch, and the bed tilted and rolled the body on its back. A large tube was placed into a slot on the back of the fake body. Suddenly, the 2 metal arms jolted forward and launched the rest of the false body up in a pushup position. It supported itself with its legs and stood up. Ellie and the other guy stared at the body, which was standing on the bed. The brain matter in the glass bowl on the top of the body was swirling around now. It had 2 augmented eyes also floating around in its bowl-like head, which were glowing red. The false body jumped off the bed and hit the ground with a clang.
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“What is happening?” The false body thought.
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The false body looked at its hands.
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“Why are my hands so grey?”
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The false body looked at the 2 scientists. The false body began to run. It exited the room to the surprise of the scientists.
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“What is this place? Why can I not hear anything?”
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It stubbed its toe on a corner in the hallway as it ran.
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“Why is it so hard to walk?!”
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Wherever it ran, it just found more white hallway. The scientists were now catching up. The false body began seeing warning signs plastered across its eyes. They said, LOW ENERGY. Then, its eyes went black, and it fell to the ground.
“Good thing we gave it limited Phag-Manosoth! It probably would’ve made it out of here!”
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4.
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“Welcome! Children of 8-Ballcougana-teelouyha-smoghakkanstrum! Our time is soon!”
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1000s of people were in seats surrounding a grand stage, on which stood Ballra, the 8-Priest. He has come to spread 8-Ballcouga’s glorious message of forgiveness and hope.
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“We only need 7 more sacrifices to make 8-Ballcouga come down and greet us! The only problem is this!”
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Ballra pointed at the large whiteboard that lay behind him. On it, a crude drawing of an albino Frülağøøse (A half-goose-half-person) was on the hard canvas.
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“We only know the location of one more albino Frülağøøse. As I just said, we need 7. This is a problem. Does anyone have any idea where an albino Frülağøøse could be?”
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The crowd of cultists collectively said “No!”
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“G*mes. Hey Бабушка! I personally request that you find more albino Frülağøøses!”
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Бабушка dashed out of the room. He had a job to do.
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5.
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The reason Ballra asked Бабушка to find the Frülağøøses is likely because he already knew the target well and was great at killing things silently. Бабушка pulled out of his trenchcoat a balacava, which he slipped on his head as he made it to his moose drawn Bå. Before he stepped inside, he pulled out a tracker, which showed the location of the singular known Frülağøøse. Inside the Bå, mounted on the wall, was a Krëigstrummer 47 Sniper Rifle. Бабушка slipped through the Bå and to the front of it, where he raised the reins and whipped the moose that was connected to the Bå. The moose stamped off angrily.
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The specific Frülağøøse that Бабушка was sent to hunt was named Хоренге, which was the only known albino Frülağøøse that they know of. Бабушка was already well acquainted with Хоренге, as Хоренге was once his wife.
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The Bå stopped at a large, glass building. The tracker had led him here. Looking through the glass, one could see exotic plants such as OBRÓĆs, Isalangkatanoms, and Fantoms. However, Бабушка wasn’t here to gape at rare plants, rather he was here to shoot Хоренге. Brandishing the Krëigstrummer 47, he ran into the stairs of the vivarium. He threw a smoke grenade into the air, which made everyone 50 meters away from him cough and fall to their knees. He made no sound sneaking through the coughing people. He ran up the stairs that led to the second floor, a catwalk that circled the vivarium. Still silent as always, he sped down the catwalk on the left side of the vivarium, and eventually made it to a corner. He looked around for a bit and spotted a white, avian-like person.
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“Bingo.”
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He raised up his Krëigstrummer 47 and looked into the scope. He moved the gun to aim at the Frülağøøse, and when it lined up with his scope, he shot.
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The bullet sped through the air and hit the Frülağøøse in the leg. Blood shot from the wound, and it fell over. The bystanders looked around for a little bit, and spotted the smoke rising from the smoke grenade. Everyone began to panic and they all ran out, leaving the Frülağøøse behind. Бабушкa ran down the steps and returned to the first floor. He found the Frülağøøse leaning over a 2-foot-tall stone wall that was meant to obstruct anyone from touching the plants, which were enclosed inside. Бабушкa looked down at the Frülağøøse and saw that it wasn’t Хоренге. It still had value, however, as it still counts. He now has to make sure the Frülağøøse stays alive, otherwise this was a pointless waste of ammunition.
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6.
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This time, there wasn’t much left, unlike the last case, which had 2 bodies. This one just had a cannister (Likely a gas grenade of some sort) and some blood on the ground. But what was he supposed to do? He just enforces, not solves. Why doesn’t he get called during the crime and not after?
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7.
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The false body’s eyes began to glow. It could see again. It sat up. Red lights were flashing everywhere. One of the scientists was holding a TL89 SMG and waving it wildly in the air. 3 bullets flew through the air and hit the scientist in the chest from down the hallway. The scientist collapsed on the ground. A man wearing a veil and a dress strode in, followed by 2 more men armed with Groouette 57s. The men grabbed the false body and took it through the hallway. The false body struggled against the men, but could not break free. They exited the laboratory where the false body was held, and they put the false body in a Carrij parked outside, which drove off.
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8.
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Wow, just wow. The Calyhorex Laboratory was broken into, but nothing appears to have been stolen. All the scientists were killed. No one survived. Most of them were killed by bullet wound, at least, that's what Conrah thought when he inspected the scene. He was a day late; the only thing that even made him come here at all was some scientist just stumbling upon all her coworkers killed and calling the enforcers. He is too late yet again.
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9.
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“What do we do with it?”
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Ballra considered this question for a while, then he replied:
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“We will armor it, and then give it a gun.”
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The man with the veil, who was present in the dark, wet room they were in, stood up from the box he was sitting on and said:
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“When we stole it from Calyhorex, its eyes were red, and it was moving.”
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“That is a safety protocol in case something like that happens. They always give it a little more Phag-Manosoth in case it needs to evade capture. I must have ran out now. Well, let’s start with the chest.”
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2 cultist welders entered the room. Ballra grabbed out a piece of paper and set it on a table nearby.
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“This is the list of the upgrades you need to add to the robot. It is incredibly detailed, so don’t blame a lack of knowing how to weld guns to a robot if you mess up.”
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Ballra left the room, and the welders began to weld Crabodium on the false body’s chest.
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10.
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“Wha…”
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Berdat woke up. Where the sigma was he?! His leg ached sorely. Then he remembered. He was visiting the vivarium with his kids, then he felt a sharp pain in his left leg. He looked down to see blood running from his leg. He blacked out from there.
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He studied his surroundings. He was in a Bå of some sort.
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“Hello?”
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No reply was heard. The Bå continued along whatever road it was driving on. It stopped. A man opened the door to the inside of the Bå. He grabbed Berdat and hoisted him on his shoulders. He carried Berdat over to a large, metal wall. The man dropped Berdat on the ground. The man put his hand on a sensor, which then showed the words: ACCESS GRANTED after contact.
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The wall slid up and revealed a large, dark cavern. Berdat was picked up again and the man began to walk through the cave.
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“Look, I don’t know who you are or what you want, but please! Take me to a g*ming hospital! For the love of Astolfo!”
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The man did not reply, just continued walking.
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After around 20 minutes, they made it to a rusty elevator, which glowed in the darkness, allowing them to see it in the first place. The man placed Berdat on the ground again, which was cold and rocky, and pressed some buttons. This called the elevator cab up. Berdat was picked up once again and brought inside the elevator cab. A happy tune that Berdat did not recognize was playing in the elevator. The man set Berdat down again and pressed a button. The cab’s doors closed, and it began to lower.
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“What do you want! Please just answer me!”
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No reply came from the man. Eventually, the elevator cab made it to the desired floor. Berdat was picked up one final time. The man carried Berdat through what appeared to be a subterranean workshop. People were running around and doing various blue-collar tasks, such as welding, sawing, and forging. The man threw Berdat onto the ground. Berdat looked up and saw a tall figure looming over him. Its head was an 8-ball, the kind Berdat played with as a boy. The 8-ball-headed thing kneeled down and looked at Berdat, or at least, moved the 8-ball’s screen in his general direction. It spoke.
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“Good job, Бабушкa. I will handle it from here.”
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As the creature spoke, green text appeared on its screen, and it was the exact text it had just spoken. It picked Berdat up in a similar fashion to the man, or as the creature called him, Бабушкa, and strided to the elevator.
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“What the un*lock is happening!”
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The creature pressed a button, and the elevator ascended even farther.
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The elevator eventually stopped once again. The creature carried him out of the elevator and through a long, narrow pathway-like bridge that had no guardrails. Under the bridge was a green pit of light that illuminated the dark, echoey abyss. Berdat was placed on a smooth stone around 3 feet tall. The 8-ball creature spun its head around to the 8 inside of the white circle, and it opened up. A green light shot out from the recently exposed hole, and pink tentacles covered in white spikes shot out from the light. They latched onto Berdat, which gave him a burning pain. The 8-ball creature began to hiss as more tentacles began to come from the hole. Soon, billions of tentacles were coming out of the creature, yet they all managed to fit in such a small space, that from a distance, it would appear that there were only 10 tentacles coming from the hole. Berdat began to scream. It wasn’t a normal scream either. It was a scream of one who knows that, however they unbl*cked up, they will not be forgiven. The tentacles began to rip away at his flesh and bone, making Berdat scream even more. Rip after rip, tear after tear, Berdat was reduced to a mere pile of flesh and bone. The tentacles gladly slurped that up as well, and nothing was left. 95Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHABfLMwGl
and then Add to home screen.