I didn't even know what to say when I saw her. She always had that effect on me. Made me lose my words or thoughts. That's how she ended up pregnant. I know what the shit looked like. Like I wasn't shit and ain't fuck with her like that but Nylani is the only person who saw me for who I was. Back then I would've told people it was just two people fuckin but it was more then that. She was more then that. Shorty and I use to just lay in my bed and she use to talk my ear off. I would tell her to shut the fuck up but when I was locked up I swear it's all I wanted to hear. That pretty ass voice laughing at something on TV or something I said. Nylani was the light that I needed but when she told me she was pregnant I panicked deep down I hope she kept the kids. A few days after she told me she was pregnant I got locked up.
It's been days since I seen her and I sat there and sat in my car and watched her. I watched her do yard work and play with my son's. I watched her go about life like we never had nothing. Like I didn't matter to her once upon a time. I mean I guess I didn't anymore but I wanted to matter to her. The boys were at school and she was planting some flowers. I walked up on her.
"Nylani." I said.
"You done watching me from your car?" She asked not looking up.
"I fucked up." I said softly to her. I hated how soft she made me.
"Fucked up? Fucked up was throwing the money at me. Telling me to get rid of them I could forgive. The three page letter you wrote to me about how I set you up and snitched to get you locked up I can't forgive you for." She said standing up.
"La shit I fucked up. I'm sorry trust me I regret that shit." I said.
"I saw you. Like really saw you. No matter how much you pushed me away I still tried. I didn't fight for a relationship because I knew what I signed up for but a snitch that's a low blow. I been raising my son's alone. I don't need you even then I didn't need you. You needed me but it's fine I don't need you to need me. As far as I'm concerned my sons don't need you either. Now leave you are ruining my me time." She said.
"I do need you." I said.
"So what I needed you. I loved you once upon a time. I gave you a prescious gift and you fucked that up now leave before I shoot you." She said.
ns216.73.216.13da2
and then Add to home screen.