THE FOOL. - Hope Was All I Had

There are things… and there are people.

Some I know.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOs2VKIxXZ2
Some I love.

And somehow, the ones I love… they never stay.

I never asked for much.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwSXxrVCAw
Not love. Not promises.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbpSMbe6Ejr
Just her presence.

But saying goodbye—typing it even—is far easier than living with it.

Because I cared. Deeply.

And now, I don’t know how to remember life before her.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhF4XKbQDar
Before the shared evenings, the bus stops, the laughter, the silences.

Still, I knew I had to let go.

Not for me.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi3AS7Mc9Is
For her.

Because if me walking away gives her peace, then I’ll walk.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoAiGu6b9S
Even if it means leaving behind the part of myself I found in her.

But I didn’t want it to end quietly.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglhaj9H4cF
I wanted it to hurt, to leave a mark—because that’s what she meant.

And so, I became the villain in my own story.

I decided: if she needs a reason to forget me, I’ll give her one.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONQ31d6ilI
A clean break. A wound that heals with time, not confusion.

So I dug out what I buried long ago—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVc2GIeHvgv
The confession.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfr8bbBGapn
The one I promised I’d never say.

I poured everything into a message—everything I was, everything we were, and everything I wanted her to be.

And one night, between externals, I confessed.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRff2YuFka
Over WhatsApp.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1YOUzQrCQ
No buildup. Just heart.

I told her the truth she never asked for.

And I knew the answer.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44PUDvTAX5
Of course I did.

It would be a no—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPO98buOEIa
In the present,345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzrDH86ZyS
In the past,345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZxqT8EUQ3
And in any faraway future I could imagine.

But she replied:

“I need some time.”

And I said I would wait.

Not because I believed the answer would change—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCGqQVnmGN
But because that’s what confessions are for.

To end things the way they should’ve never begun.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzxSyS54KI

She asked that if I knew what her answer would be.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUgJBQi9wgZ
I replied 49/51.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOH2O3klZK
Knowing damn well that it was 100% a No.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8yaKkB4ba
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTcuZx1HqM
but something deep inside replied with a 49% a Yes.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKMzbFSPGk
even it couldn't say Yes a 50%.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPET1iR0HM
cause It and I knew from a long time.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrEo9gVz0D
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHw3loVAlKS
The externals started.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8FWuHQiN5
The rush came back flying.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBksuHHkvKC
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qkztBSVY8
While I was in a war with thoughts.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1olDeVQyl8
And as the days went on.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpT9naaULKs
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCCCldxE5L

One random night, while I waited in silence,345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgG7OlArAU
The universe had one more tragedy to give.

Outside my home, I sat alone under the sky—my mind a war zone of logic and hope.

My mother stepped out for a walk, along with Potti—my dog, my companion—and her one and only pup.

The pup didn’t even have a name yet.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsi992PMgy0
I was waiting for Seren to name her.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kiujDUBCh
But life didn’t wait for names.

Suddenly, a pack of street dogs came rushing.

They attacked—vicious, fast, merciless.

Without thinking, I ran to them—bare hands, bare heart.

I tried.

God, I tried.

Screaming, pushing, shielding Potti and the pup.

But it wasn’t enough.

They bit me, tore into my arms and legs,345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjS1QgiMnJH
while I wrapped myself around the ones I loved.

Six dogs.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxzZbcYmuX6
No help.

Until my father and neighbors came rushing.

But by then—

It was too late.

In my arms, Potti lay still—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUokMal7Xps
Her fur stained with blood, her neck torn.

The pup, her tiny body broken, missing a leg,345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuP3Gb28eM
barely breathing.

We rushed them to the nearest hospital.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6pY5X8fus3
Tears finally came after years of holding them back.

But hope was all I carried.

And hope was not enough.

They couldn’t save them.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Tm4RF1bj3
No one could.

And I was left—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZIcBoMVlI
Bloody.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ29cy0B9arw
Bitten.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWml28Y0He
Alone.

A boy with too many wounds—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmBxfk7566
Some you could see.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrF6giLazWc
Most you couldn’t.

I didn’t know what to do.

So, that night, I messaged her.

“Hey, are you awake?”

There was silence in my house.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2PQeb3fj1
And an even louder one inside me.

I had an exam the next morning.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrGAz54vsN
An external.

But nothing felt more urgent than that question I couldn’t stop asking:

What matters more—345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFtbOpuuMct
The present or the future?

Until that night, I never even thought about it.

But that night… I got my answer.

Both matter.

And yet, when forced to choose, we weigh them.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjEs7erbjp
We try to balance what we feel and what we know.

The heart says stay.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlfuu7YuxSA
The mind says go.

One believes.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFav7Q6MtKf
One doubts.

One clings.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KztwcVPsl
One lets go.

And so I waited for her reply.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu8WcNi8k4f
But it didn’t come.

Morning came instead.

Same bus.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghe6qhjF4Z
Same college.

But I wasn't the same.

I wore a mask—like always.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXE0ZkQsoa
Attended the exam.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEyvAFdpMX
Laughed with friends.345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrP0RdLNKZW
Pretended.

Because that’s what Rudeus is for.

But who could’ve guessed?

That in the evening—

After everything had burned down—

The answer to my confession would finally arrive.

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