我鍾意同妳鬥氣，其實只係因為… （已完結） - 三百二十

三百二十

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（葉佩儀視角）

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「最後你仲有冇嘢同我講？」

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我叫做用晒所有勇氣先至夠膽問阿必呢句。

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阿必微一愕然，諗咗幾秒，先露出個痴線佬既笑容同我講︰「我走喇，唔好咁掛住我啊。」

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「仲有冇啊？」我急問。

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「哦！梗係有喇，萬一我真係黎唔到妳婚禮，我喺度預早祝妳同石生百年好合、永結同心，仲要…」死人必露出咗個猥褻既笑容，道︰「…仲有連生貴子！」

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佢講完仲笑騎騎咁好似等我有乜嘢反應…

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我諗之前既我可能真係發嬲咁打阿必，打到佢跪地求饒…

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但而家阿必咁樣祝福我，令到我突然意識到，我真係就黎同石生結婚，而我眼前呢個男人，根本就冇打算過要向我講啲乜嘢挽留我，仲要真心真意咁去祝福我同石生…

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我真係蠢，點會對阿必有期望？點解我會信淇淇同埋余正熙？

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「嗯…」

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「喂？喂？」

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「唔？」

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「妳做乜嘢hang咗機咁啊？」林必才問︰「唔鍾意我咁講笑？」

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我勉強笑笑搖頭，道︰「唔係啊。你都係時候返去喇，聽日晏晝機，唔好執漏嘢啊。」

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「放心，執漏咪喺果面買囉！」阿必笑騎騎地道。

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「嗯…咁…再見…」

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「再見，我過到去再send message比妳報平安！」阿必道。

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我開門跳落車，然後目送住阿必架車離開…心入面仲期望佢會唔會突然間停車，然後跳落黎同我講…叫我唔好結婚…因為佢發現自己鍾意既係我…

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然而，呢一切都冇發生。

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我企咗喺度呆咗一陣，然後嘆咗口氣，再慢慢走去石生屋企果座大廈…

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「阿儀，妳今晚面色好似唔係幾好喎，見唔舒服？」石生問。

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返到屋企之後，我就咁坐咗喺梳化，同石生一齊睇電視。

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但嚴格黎講，我諗只有石生一個係睇緊電視，而我，只係望住電視個方向放空，個心入面仲諗住阿必…

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不過石生咁問到，我就搖搖答佢，道︰「冇嘢啊我，可能有啲攰啫。」我從梳化企起身，道︰「我想沖個涼早啲休息。」

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石生有少少擔心地道︰「真係冇唔舒服？如果真係唔舒服，唔好自己一個人死撐啊，聽日去睇醫生，拎一日半日病假都冇問題。」

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聽到石生咁講，其實我有一剎那真係諗不如真係拎病假，然後去送林必才機，不過旋即我又諗起今日我同佢既大部份對話…算喇，佢根本就唔想我去送佢機…

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於是我搖搖頭，嘗試露出一個令石生可以安心既笑容，道︰「冇啊，真係有少少攰咋。」

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石生道︰「咁妳早啲沖完涼，之後早啲休息喇。好彩妳今晚喺我度過夜，我聽朝車妳返工，好過同人逼地鐵。」

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其實，唔止石生，阿必都曾經好多次用佢老闆既貨van接送我返工…不過呢一點，其實我冇話過比石生知。

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我拎咗啲衫，然後走入去洗手間沖涼，當花灑既水打落我既身上既時候，我不禁回想起今日本身既打算，仲有出門見阿必之前既忐忑不安…

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尋日同淇淇傾完之後，我特登返咗自己屋企，比自己思考清楚自己既心意。

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然後…

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我發現…

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其實我對林必才既心意係一啲都冇變到，只係自從當日喺學校無意中聽到佢同余正熙透露佢係鍾意淇淇之後，我就一直強壓住自己既心意…強逼自己唔好再有奢望、強逼自己只可以視佢為好朋友、強逼自己接受其他新戀情…

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久而久之…連我自己都以為自己真係唔再鍾意林必才…直至到當日阿必送我返屋企時攬實我既果一個擁抱…我先發覺…自己對佢仲有留戀…跟住喺新聞見到林必才同靚模傳緋聞，我會發覺自己竟然有啲呷醋…而經過尋晚同淇淇一席話之後，更加係有啲感動…

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…

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同埋心動。

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我知咁樣對石生好衰，亦都好唔公平，但我就係控制唔到自己既感情…

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原來一直以來，我對阿必既感情係一啲都冇變過，我仲係好鍾意佢，只係自己埋藏住呢份感情，搞到連自己都真係差啲相信咗自己對林必才真係冇嘢…真係只當佢係普通朋友…

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唉，我都唔知應該多謝淇淇定埋怨佢好…早唔講、遲唔講，偏偏到我臨同石生結婚之前先黎講…

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仲有余正熙…佢咁樣究竟係想幫林必才定係害我冇得結婚…？

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而家去到呢個地步，我仲點呃到自己對林必才只係好朋友？

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我思前想後、輾轉反側，尋晚成晚都瞓唔好，自己既心意其實就已經搞得好清楚，但問題係自己究竟想點…

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我鍾唔鍾意石生？咁毫無疑問我對佢真係有感情，如果唔係連同佢開始都唔會，更遑論應承同佢結婚…

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只係…對石生有感情還有感情，鍾意還鍾意，但我發覺自己去到呢一刻，對林必才既感情原來喺日積月累、自己唔情既情況下，深厚到已經遠遠超出咗「鍾意」呢個境界…

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但係石生對我咁好，而且婚禮既籌備都如火如涂，我可以點做好？

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失眠諗咗成晚，最後尋晚我終於下定咗決心，做咗一個決定，但呢個決定並唔係我一個人做…而係，我要埋阿必同我一齊做。

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（待續）

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